Impendulo kumbuzo wokuthi uthando luhlala phi ubudlelwane, imanani ayiniki ithemba - kuphela malunga neminyaka emithathu, emva koko i-45% yezibini ziwahlukana. Nangona kunjalo, amaqhinga amasha ahlala ebonakala, achaza ukuba yintoni uthando, kunye nobude obunquma.
Uthando luhlala ixesha elingakanani umtshato?
Ukususela kumbono we-physiology, uthando ngumphumo we-hormonal "cocktail" ezayo egazini, ebangela ukudideka kweengcamango, ukungazinzi , ukubethelwa, ukunyamezela kunye neminye imiqondiso yoluvo. Lo mmandla wothando olunzima luhlala ixesha elifutshane nje ukuya kwiinyanga ezintandathu. Yaye ukuba ngaba bathandekayo emva kwesi sihlandlo bahlala kunye, iinkqubo ezahlukeneyo zengqondo ziquka.
Ngokuqhelekileyo, umbuzo wothando oluninzi, uzama ukuphendula i-psychology. Iingcali zihlula amanqanaba amaninzi omthando, olandelana ngokulandelanayo:
- uthando, uthando - eli nqanaba lihlala kwiintsuku ezimbalwa ukuya kwiiveki ezimbalwa, lubonakaliswa ngokugqithiseleyo ngeengcamango malunga nento enqwenelekayo, ukungakwazi ukucinga ngenye into (umzekelo owaziwayo wothando olunjalo - iRomeo noJuliet);
- Uthando olunemigangatho yithuba elide, elihlala kwiinyanga eziliqela ukuya kwiminyaka eyi-1.5-2, ebonakala ngokubonakala kweemvakalelo ezifanelekileyo, xa umthandi elindele ukuba into enomdla iya kuhambelana neminqweno yakhe;
- Utshintsho oluthandweni-eli nqanaba liphela iminyaka engama-1-2, ebonakala ngokunciphisa ukunyaniseka kweminqweno kunye nomnqweno woba kunye kunye, ukuthembela, ukunyamekela, ukufuna ukuphazamiseka kuqale ukuqinisa ubudlelwane;
- uthando - eli nqanaba linokuhlala iminyaka emininzi, ukuba ukuqonda, intlonipho kunye nobuhlobo bubusa phakathi kwabathandekayo, ubudlelwane beli nqanaba abusekelwe kwii-hormone, kodwa kwi-attachment kwaye kulondolozwe umdla wesondo.
Uthando luhlala ixesha elide kangakanani?
Uthando ekude alukwazi ukubizwa ngokuba ngumvakalelo oqhelekileyo, nangona kunjalo uhlala ixesha elide kunokuba ubuhlobo bentsapho obuqhelekileyo. Abantu abafumana uthando kumgama bangahlukaniswa ngamaqela amabini:
- "Fanatki" - ngokuqhelekileyo eli qela libandakanya amantombazana abanomdla wobuntu beendaba;
- othandekayo, ehlala ngokwahlukileyo, kodwa ngokuhlangana rhoqo - kule meko ezininzi izibini zanamhlanje ziwa, ngubani omele aneliseke ngomtshato "umgama" okanye ulwalamano oluhle.
Uthando lwe "fanatok" alupheli ixesha elide ngenxa yokungakwazi ukudideka kwintando, kuba ahlangane naye. Ulwalamano olulolo hlobo lusempilweni, kwaye ungabanqanda kuphela ngokuthandana nomntu oqhelekileyo.
Ukuhlala ngokwahlukileyo abathandi banomdla oqinileyo kwiibini eziqhelekileyo-abafungi ngenxa yemiba yemihla ngemihla, intlanganiso nganye ifana neeholide. Yingakho ubuhlobo obunjalo buhlala buhlala. Nangona kunjalo, kulo mzekelo, kwakukho "iingcipheko" - ukuba isibini siqala ukuhlala kunye ngokusisigxina, iimpikiswano phakathi kwazo ziya kuba zibi kakhulu kunezo zibini eziqhelekileyo,
Uthando luhlala ixesha elingakanani emva kokuhlukana?
Ngokwezibalo, emva kweminyaka engama-10 yomtshato, malunga ne-70% yezibini zitshatyalaliswa. Kwaye akusoloko bebatshatileyo ngexesha elifanayo bafuna ukuhlukana, oko kuthetha ukuba omnye wabafazi baqhubeka bebathanda. Ezi zithandabuzo ziyakwazi ukuhlala iminyaka, kuba umtshato kule nkqubo yinkqubo engaphelelanga. Ngeenkqubo ezingagqitywanga, okanye i-gestalt, izazi zengqondo zisebenza, zinceda ukukrazula le meko ephazamisayo, kunye neemeko zomgcini-uxhalaba, uxinzelelo, ukuxhatshazwa, njl njl. Xa ufumene uncedo lwe-psychotherapist, umntu unokurhoxisa uthando olungalunganga emva kokuhlukana kwaye aqale ubomi obutsha, kwaye, kungekudala kwenzeka, ngcono.