Ngamanye amaxesha abazali banenkxalabo yokuba umntwana uyabetha, kwaye, okokuqala, kufuneka uqonde isizathu sokuba akwenze.
Izizathu zokubamba
Inyaniso kukuba ukuba iminyaka yobudala kukho izizathu, ezikhokelela ekuziphatheni okunjalo. Ukufikelela kwiinyanga ezi-7-8, ngokuqhelekileyo umntwana usalonda ngexesha lokusondla, ngokuqhelekileyo kubangelwa yimpilo engafanelekanga okanye ukunganakali emlonyeni. Oku kungabangelwa ukuhamba. Kule meko, iintsana kufuneka zinikezelwe amathoyizi akhethekileyo kunye namaconti, okubizwa ngokuba ngamagundane.
Kwenzeka ukuba ukubetha umntwana oneminyaka emininzi, unokukwenza oko nangenxa yokutya. Kodwa kweli nqanaba lophuhliso, ukuziphatha kakubi kudla ngokuba ngumphumo wokugqithisa. Kwiimeko ezinjalo, ngokuqinisekileyo kuthiwa "akunjalo". I-crumb ayengazi indlela yokulawula iimvakalelo zakhe kwaye akanako ukubonisa iimvakalelo ngamazwi, ngoko uyazibonisa ngendlela efikelelekayo.
Kususela kwiminyaka eyi-1 kuya kwe-3 ubudala umntwana usoloko esebenzisa le mkhuba, ezama ukulawula omnye umntwana, ongaphantsi komntu omdala. Nangona kunjalo, abantwana bavakalisa ukucaphukisa, ukucaphuka. Kubalulekile ukuqonda amaqhekeza amagama aqondayo ayenzakalisa kwaye ukuba ukuziphatha okunjalo akuvumelekanga, ukufundisa ukulawula iimvakalelo zabo. Kufuneka ubeke ingqalelo ekuphuhlisweni kwentetho, ukwandisa isigama, esiza kukuvumela ukuba uchaze iingcamango zakho.
Ndifanele ndidibane nini nengcali?
Ngokuqhelekileyo, uncedo lwe-psychologist okanye ugqirha ukulungisa ingxaki enjalo ayimfuneko. Ngeminyaka engama-3, baninzi abantwana banokukukhusela lo mkhuba. Kodwa kukho iimeko xa umbuzo wento oyenzayo, ukuba umntwana uyabetha, ufuna isikhalazo kubaqeqeshi:
- kwiintsana ezingaphezu kweminyaka emithathu;
- Abazali abanakuzimela ngokuzimela ngokucoca iinqhekeza ukusuka kweso senzo;
- i-crumb ibonisa kwakhona ezinye iintlobo zobudlova ;
- ukuba umntwana uyaluma ukuze athole into efunwayo, ithoyiyitha, kwaye yenza njalo.
Abazali bamele baqaphele ukuba loo mkhwa uyingqungquthela kubantwana abaninzi, kwaye ngeendlela ezifanelekileyo akunzima ukulahla. Ukulimala okwenziwe ngale ndlela ngokuqhelekileyo akuyi kuba yingozi okanye unyango lwezempilo. Ukuba umonakalo ube ngegazi, isilonda kufuneka siphathwe. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba uyaziwa ukuba umntwana ochaphazelekayo unomzimba obuthathaka ngenxa yeso sizathu, kungcono ukunxibelelana nogqirha ukukhusela intsholongwane.