Umbhali wencwadi ethi "Ubulumko Ebubambeni Bakho" UJean Haner uxela ukuba imilomo inokutshela ngokumalunga nomntu kunye nokuziphatha kwakhe kwintsebenziswano, umzekelo. Ngokombono wakhe, zonke iimpawu zomzimba womntu azinikwe ngethuba, oko kuthetha ukuba banokuhlaziywa kwaye bahlaziywe.
1. Igolide ithetha.
Izindebe azilona zincinci kwaye zinyani. Ubume babanini babo, njengomthetho, ngokulinganayo. Azingabushushu yaye aziyi kubangela abahlaziyi abangenangqiqo kwimigangatho yabo. Kodwa abayikuziyeka ngokupheleleyo kwiintlobano. Kubomi babantu abanjalo, yonke into imele ibe ngokumodareyitha.
2. Umlomo ophezulu ophakamileyo.
Inzululwazi yaseShayina yokufunda abantu iqinisekile: ukuba umntu uguqula ubuso bakhe, wenza utshintsho kwisiphelo sakhe. Oko kukuthi, ukuba wenze into ebusweni bakho, wehla uvela endleleni oye uyiceba.
UHaner ukholelwa ukuba umntu owenze okuthile ngomlomo wakhe uba nzima kakhulu, ukuzingca, uyeke ukulawula iimvakalelo zakhe kwaye ngokuphindaphindiweyo ube nguvulindlela weenkqubo ezintle.
Ukuba umlomo ophezulu ungaphezu kwezantsi kwendalo, umnikazi wayo kufuneka abe ngumntu ovulekileyo novelwano, obani abanye iingxaki zabantu ezixhalabisa kakhulu kunabo.
3. Umlomo ophantsi ophakamileyo.
Ngokuqhelekileyo, abantu abafuna ukuzithobela, kunye nabadlali abanomdla kunye nabo bafuna ukufumana izinto ezinonophelo ezivela ebomini, ngokuqhelekileyo baya kuqhuba ukunyusa umlomo ophantsi.
4. Yonke imilebe yomlomo evela kwimvelo.
Kuyifani isimo esifanelekileyo. Abasweleyo bakhe ngaphezu kweyiphi na ehlabathini bayakuvuyela umama. Banobakhathalela kuqala kunye nabanye kwaye bafumane ukuzonwabisa kwangempela kuyo. Bakhetha ngokukhethekileyo abahlobo kwaye baququzelele nje ngabantu abatsha. Kwaye abantu abanjalo baxabisa kakhulu ubudlelwane.
5. Umlenze ophezulu nangaphezulu.
Abanikazi beempahla zabo, abaye bazive bengaphezu kokukhululekile. Hayi, oku akuthethi ukuba abantu abanjalo babi ngobudlelwane. Uninzi lwawo aludala izinyunyana ezingaphantsi kunezona "ziqhayisa". Ngethuba lokuba bahlala bekhululekile bodwa.
6. Umlenze entendeni ephezulu ufana namaphiko aphilileyo.
Abani beli fomu yemilomo banxibelelwano olufanelekileyo. Ziyaziwa kunye nokudala. Ngenxa yokunyamezela kwabo, bahlala besithi, ngaphambi kokuba bacinge, ngoko bakhubeka abanye.
7. Iingcebiso ezixakile kumlomo ophezulu.
Bachaza umntu njengomntu onobubele kwaye ohloniphekileyo, onesihe novelwano.
8. Phantse umlomo ophezulu.
Lo ngumqondiso wokungahambi kwemida. Abantu abanomlomo onjalo bazincama. Ingxaki yabo enkulu kukuba bazama ukuthatha isisombululo kuzo zonke iintlobo zeengxaki, ngamanye amaxesha kungekhona zabo. Yaye oku akusoloko kusisigqibo esifanelekileyo.
9. Imilomo yemvelo ikhupha phezulu kunye nezantsi.
Abaniki bomlomo othanda ukuba yimbindi yenkxalabo kwaye abayikunyamezela ukulondeka. Ngobudlelwane, baxhomekeke kumdlalo kunye nokuzingca. Kodwa iimeko ezivuyisayo kunye neemeko ezininzi zihlawulela ezi mpazamo.
10. Umlomo omncinci ngomlomo okhuni.
Ngobudlelwane, abanini beli qela baqala ukucinga ngabo. Kodwa enyanisweni azinjalo. Xa befumene inxalenye efunekayo yenkcazelo kwisiqingatha sesibini, bakhawuleza bahlawule ukuhlawulwa. Xa selutsha, aba bantu banokuhlupheka ngenxa yesidingo sokuba noqhagamshelwano kwicala. Kodwa xa bebudala banokubakho.
11. Umlomo ophezulu ongapheliyo kunye nomgangatho ophantsi oqhelekileyo.
Kuba abanini bemilebe yomsebenzi umsebenzi wokuqala. Ngenxa yoko, kukho iingxaki kwiinkalo. Bajwayele ukukhawuleza ukukhawuleza kwindawo ethile kwaye ngoko abazi ngokwenene ukuphumula. Ngokwezibalo, uHaner, umlomo onjalo unama-60% amadoda.
12. Umlomo omkhulu kunye nemilomo ekhuphayo.
Umntu onomlomo onjalo unomdla kwaye uhlala ecinga malunga noko anokunceda abanye. Ngokuphambene noko, abantu abanomlomo omkhulu kunye nemilomo emincinci bayamfihlo kwaye bazingca.
UHaner uyaqiniseka ukuba kwenzeka ntoni ngomlomo ngexesha lemihla echaphazela ubudlelwane. Ngoko, umzekelo, ukuba kufuneka utyande imilomo yakho, ulwalamano lunokuqala ukuba neengxaki.