Kutheni abantwana bam bengandiphuliphuli kwaye bawaphula?

Ngoxa bebeletha, kwaye emva kokukhulisa umntwana, abazali banethemba lokwenene lokubulela, kodwa amaninzi amanqanaba atyhulayo afumana ukungathobeli, kunye nokutshutshiswa.

Impendulo emacaleni omnye kumbuzo weso sokuba umntwana ekhwaza njalo, ehlwitha kubazali kwaye ayithobeli, akukho bani unokunika. Emva koko, kwimeko nganye, kukho izizathu zolu, kodwa makhe sizame ukuqwalasela eziqhelekileyo zazo.

Kutheni abantwana bengalaleli abazali babo?

Iintsana, ngokukodwa kwiminyaka emibini emva kweminyaka emibili nje kuphela abazi indlela yokuvakalisa iimvakalelo zabo kunye nemvakalelo yabo ngenye indlela. Kungenxa yoko, ngohlobo lokuqhankqalaza, abantwana abayithobeli umama xa bejonga ukuba bachanekile. Indlela yokungathobeli kunye nabahlaziyili kuphela yinto efumanekayo kubo kunokuba bayisebenzise. Ukuphuma kule meko kunokuba nobubele kunye nokuqonda kuphela kwinqanaba yabazali, kodwa kungekhona isigwebo.

Abazali abaninzi bayamangaliswa: "Kutheni abantwana bam bengandiphuliphuli, bebandezele kum, ngokuqinisekileyo kwinqanaba lomgangatho?". Sekusekuqaleni kweminyaka yobudala, ukunyanzela ukuphendula kwisicelo esifanayo kunokunika umntwana amandla okuqhelekileyo. Emva kokuba umntwana, nokuba ngumntwana osemtsha, uyaziqonda ukuxhomekeka kwakhe ngokupheleleyo kubazali, kodwa ufuna ukuzimela, engazi ukuba njani.

Ndingamnceda njani?

Ewe, ewe, ngumntwana, kunye naye kunye nam. Ubhekene nokuziphatha kwakhe okubi kwaye yena, kwaye kungekhona nje kuphela abasondeleyo. Okokuqala, kuyimfuneko ukuseka intetho, nangayiphi na iminyaka. Amazwi okuzola, ngamabomu kubantu abadala kunye nokuqonda ngokuqinisekileyo ngamava enyana okanye intombi, unokutshintsha imeko.

Ukuba awuqondi isizathu sokuba umntwana angayithobeli okokuqala, mamela ngokucophelela. Mhlawumbi yile ndlela afuna ukubonisa ngayo ukuba unengxaki ethile kunye nentsapho yakhe okanye oontanga, kwaye ngoko uzama ukubandakanya abantu abasondelene naye ekuxazululeni ingxaki, kodwa kungekhona ngokufaka izicelo, kodwa ngendlela engathandekiyo.

Xa kunzima ukuqonda iintshukumo zomntwana kwaye kuyimfuneko ukuba uthathe amanyathelo asebenzayo ngaphezu kwentetho yeentliziyo-ntliziyo, ungenzi ngohlwayo olusesikweni, olwenza lukhusele ngakumbi umntu okhulayo, kodwa lunqanda ukuzonwabisa. Le yindlela ephumelelayo, kodwa kufuneka ilandelwe ngokucacileyo kwaye ingagcini indlela ekhethiweyo.