Ukuphindaphindiweyo rhoqo umfazi wesibini ubuza umbuzo: "Ziziphi iimvakalelo endizenzayo kumthandi wam?". Emva koko, ukuba kulula ukucacisa umgca phakathi kothando nothando , ngoko ke uvakalelo lokuqala lwenhliziyo esuka kunzima kakhulu ukwahlula ngamanye amaxesha. Siza kufumana isisombululo kwingxaki, xa ingxaki yemvelaphi yemeko yakho yeemvakalelo ivela ngokungalindelekanga, kwaye ibukhali.
Uthando okanye uthando?
Uthando, inokwenzeka, lunokuchazwa ngokudibanisa isisa, ukukhangwa kwezesondo, inhlonipho kunye nokholo. Kwaye xa igama elithi "uthando" luchazwa, ingcinga ivela ngokungafuni ukuchitha yonke imihla ngaphandle kwalo mntu. Kodwa musa ukudibanisa le ngcamango ngomkhwa. Ngoko, tyenziswa kwinto engathandekiyo, umzekelo, utshintshiswano lwamalanga onke ngamazwi abukhali kunye noninazala. Ngokuqinisekileyo, isinamathiselo sinokubonakalisa kokubili ubudlelwane kunye nentanda, kunye nokuthetha nabahlobo.
I-psychology ye-attachment yinto enokuthi ivela ngenxa yoko, ithi, ngokuzalwa kobubele obungaphantsi. Oko kukuthi, ngokuqinisekileyo umntu ongenalo uthando lomlingane ngumntu ongaphelelanga, kungekhona umntu opheleleyo. Kwaye oku kubonisa ukuba kumntu womnye uzama ukuzongeza.
Uthini umahluko phakathi kothando nothando?
Ngobudlelwane obunothando, amaqabane angakwazi ukukholisa omnye nomnye ngokunyamekela kwaye kunye nobuntwana. Ngethuba elinye, nangona ukugaya nokuxabana, bazama ukuya kwintlanganiso kunye, bazama ukufumana imithombo ephambili ebangela ukungavumelani. Uthando lokwenene, kungekhona uthando, kwaye lukhula ngobudlelwane obuvuthiweyo.
Indlela yokulahla uthando lomntu?
- Funda ukugxila kweli xesha. Ngokukhawuleza xa uziva ubonakaliso lwangaphakathi lwesithando, thunyelwa kulo mzuzwana. Ngenxa yokuba, xa ukhumbule into ethile, uyithwala kwixesha elidlulileyo. Kwaye ngelo xesha awuhlali. Ziyakhumbula, kungekhona ubomi.
- Ngaba uziva uthanda? Zibuze into oyifunayo. Ngamanye amaxesha, ngeengcinga zendoda ethandekayo, sinokuzalisa ukungena ngaphakathi, ngoko ke akukho uthando apha.
- Yiba ngumntu owaziyo. Yenza u-yoga, ucamngce. Lahla imikhwa emibi.