Ngamanye amaxesha ubomi bungaqinisekanga kwaye, ekudlaleni kwethu, ngokungalindelekanga kuthi, utshintshe iqhinga labalinganiswa abakhulu. Kubonakala ngathi yindalo indoda yakho ethandekayo yayikukhangele ngokuthembekileyo, ithembisa ukuba iyayithanda yonke imihla yakhe, kodwa indlela yokulibala ngoku ukuba ungumfazi olahliwe. Kungenzeka ukuba ngoku awuqondi ukuba ungaphi amandla, ukuhlala uphila, ukudala nokuphinde umthande umntu. Kwaye into eyona nto inzima ukuyiqonda yinto efunekayo eyenziwe ukulibala indoda leyo eninzi enxulumene nayo.
Ubomi buqhubeka
Kububudenge ukuphikisa into yokuba ukulahlekelwa yothando, ukuhlukana nomthandi, ukuxabela kakhulu isimo sengqondo somntu. Iyakwazi ixesha elide, inyanga, iminyaka ukunciphisa imiva yolonwabo, uthando, ukucima kwiimbala ezikhanyayo. Kodwa kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuba kukho icebo elikunceda ukujamelana neentlekele zokuhlukana. Siya kukunika ingqalelo ingcebiso yesazi sengqondo esiza kukunceda ukuvula ukuphefumula kwakho okwesibini, kwaye uya kuqonda ukuba ungayikhohlwa njani indoda yakho ethandekayo.
- UFrud wabhala ukuba kubaluleke kakhulu "ukucima amandla angqondo engumntu osithandayo, kodwa ngoku into elahlekileyo." Kodwa akunakwenzeka ukuphuma e-yolwandle yokudumala kunye nentlungu, ngaphandle kokuzinikela kumaza angcolileyo. Ngako oko, uMthetho we-1 kwiNdlela eya ebomini obungcono ngaphandle kwakhe, umthandi wakho, kukuvumela ukuba udikelele, usizi, ukhumbule okulungileyo kakhulu nakweyona nto ephakathi kwakho. Khumbula konke abakufuna ukukusho, kodwa abazange baqine. Ndikholelwe, kungcono ukukhulula iimvakalelo zakho kunokuzifihla kwindawo ethile ebunzulu bakho. Ngokukhawuleza okanye kamva baya kuzenza bazive, kodwa kwenzeka ukuba oku kuvela kungekhona ngexesha.
- "Ungayikhohlwa njani indoda emva kokuhlukana, ngakumbi ukuba iimvakalelo azizange zikhuphe kuye?" Lo mbuzo ubeka inani elininzi labasetyhini. Kodwa kukho njalo ukukhanya ekupheleni kwelakho, kuyo yonke imeko kukho ukuphuma. Ngoko ke, xa ubuqili bokuqala bokulahlekelwa yinto ethandwayo luthintela, bube bukhuni kwaye ukhulule ngokwakho kuzo zonke iifoto, izinto ezazisenjalo. Ukuba ngokukodwa isandla asivuki ukutshabalalisa konke oku, ukupakisha kwaye uyithumele konke kulowo owaphula ubuhlobo bakho. Zizame ukuya kumaphepha akhe asekuhlaleni. Ukuqhawula ukuqhagamshelana nabaqhelana nabo. Akukho siqinisekiso sokuba oku kuya kunikwa lula. Kodwa, kholwani mna, xa ukuxhamla kunye neempawu eziphathekayo zememori yakho malunga nomthandi wangaphambili uyalala, uya kuba ulungele ukuqhubeka uphila ngendlela entsha.
- Iingcali zengqondo zibhekisela kwinqanaba lesithathu lokukhululwa kwiimvakalelo kunye nemvakalelo endala, isigaba "sokuhlukana." Oku kubangelwa ukuba ngoku ukususela engqondweni yakho kukho imifudlana emibini yokuphila - enye eyayinayo na oyithandayo kunye nekhoyo, ngaphandle kwayo. Kanye ngokukhawuleza wena, ngokumangalisa ngokwakho, uya kuqonda ukuba unakho ngaphandle kwentlungu entliziyweni yakho, khangela emva. Xa oku kwenzeka, awuyi kuba yiqhawe eliphambili lakho elidlulileyo, kodwa kuphela umlindi, umgcini wezinkumbulo. Kodwa akayi kuphinda.
- Akunakunyulwa ukuba uya kuqwalasela okukhethwa kukho okunjengokuthi "Nokuba ndithe ndambiza?". Yiphosa "ukuba-ngokukhawuleza." Balekela kude nabo. Ungaze uyibone.
Qhubeka phambili ngaphandle kokubuya.
Kubalulekile ukuqaphela ukuba iingqondo zengqondo zicebisa ngamandla, emva kokulahleka okukhulu, ukuhlukana nokungakhethi ubudlelwane obutsha kunye nenjongo yokuguqula iqabane lakho, masithi, "kwi-plaster" yesilonda sakho sengqondo. Olu lwalamano aluyi kuba nolonwabo oluphela. Uyakwazi ukulibala ngokukhawuleza indoda yakho oyithandayo, kodwa ngokukhawuleza xa uvumela umphefumlo ukuba uphumule, cinga kwakhona oko kwenzekayo, fumana amava kwaye ube namandla. Yonke into ithatha ixesha. Kodwa musa ukulibala ukuba umntu ngamnye ufuna ikhefu lexesha elilodwa kubo: ngamnye umntu kwiinyanga ezimbalwa, kwaye umntu kuphela ngonyaka uya kuziva ngathi uhlaziywa ngobuntu.