Ibhinqa namhlanje izama ukuhlala kuyo kwaye ihlale iqala. Ubungqina obugqibeleleyo, i-makeup, i-wardrobe, umyalelo opheleleyo endlwini, ukuqhubela phambili ngokukhawuleza kwinqanaba lomsebenzi, ubomi bomntu buphumelele-akukuko konke okwenziwe ngumfazi wanamhlanje. Kwaye oku akubi, kodwa kuncomeka kakhulu. Nangona kunjalo, njengoko uyazi, yonke into ilungele ukumodareyitha. Ukugqithisa, ukunyaniseka nokuqhubekayo ukuzama ukufumana isiqhamo esihle sikubiza ngokuba yi-perfectionism. Oko, ekuboneni kokuqala, umsebenzi oqaqambileyo ungabangela ukuba wonke umntu abe nokuphazamiseka kwemihlaba, kwaye oku, kukhokelela ekuqhubeni kokuphazamiseka, ukudandatheka. Ngokwazi, isifo sabasetyhini benkulungwane yama-21 kukuphelela, ngoko kuyimfuneko ukuqonda indlela yokulwa nayo.
Okokuqala, makhe sijonge intsingiselo yegama lokugqibelela kwingqondo. Ukususela kwimbono yenzululwazi, phantsi kwe-pefectionism iyaqondwa ngumnqweno ophucukileyo wokugqwesa, okwazi ukuxubusha kokubili ubuntu kunye naluphi uhlobo lomsebenzi. Kukho ukuphelela okuphilileyo kunye neentsholongwane. Ngomntu onempilo unako ukufumana isohlwayo elincinci nje, ingqwalasela yakhe igxile kumandla abo kunye neendlela zokufezekisa iinjongo zabo. Ngokubeka iinjongo eziphezulu kunye nokulwa nomendo wokuzifezekisa, umntu ufumana uvuyo. Ukuphelela okupheleleyo kwintlalo kuthetha ukuba umntu uzibeka ngokwakhe iinjongo ezingenakwenzeka kwaye uhambela kubo kungekhona ngenxa yesifiso nokuzonwabisa, kodwa ngenxa yokwesaba ukungaphumeleli. Ngenxa yoko, ukuphishekela ukulungelelanisa kube yintlungu.
Uvela phi ukufuna umnqweno?
Izizathu zokungaphelelekanga okunjalo zihlala zigcinwe ebuntwaneni ngabazali. Mhlawumbi bakubonisa indlela abaziphatha ngayo ukuba xa ungabonakali umphumo obalaseleyo kwinto ethile, ke udumise kwaye ungaboni. Yile ndlela indlela yokuzithemba ngokunyanisekileyo kunye nokwesaba ukuvakalelwa njengento elahlekileyo. Ngokuqhelekileyo kwenzeka ukuba ekukhuleni akukho mntu ufuna iiphumo elihle, kodwa uyazifuna wena - ukwenza ngokwakho ukuzithemba, ukuzibonakalisa ukuba ufanelekile into ethile.
Indlela yokujongana nokufezekisa?
Ukuba uqaphele ukuba ukuzama ukuphila okungcono akuzange kukuvuyise ixesha elide, ngoko kunyango lokuphelelisa oku kuncinci kodwa kuya kukunceda:
- Funda ukubeka phambili, ukwahlula iinjongo ngokubaluleka, kwaye usasaze imizamo yakho ngendlela efanelekileyo.
- Zinike ilungelo lokungagqibekanga nantoni na, kuba wonke umntu unemigangatho yakhe yokugqwesa kwaye awuyi kukukholisa wonke umntu.
- Ukuze ugcine isimo sakho somzimba kunye nesimo sengqondo kubalulekile ukufunda ukuphumla, umsebenzi omnye kunye nokuphumla.
- Ukuba kunokwenzeka, kucetyiswa ukuba uthathe ikhefu kwaye emva kwexesha ukhangele umsebenzi owenzile ngokujonga okutsha. Mhlawumbi akukubi nje ngokuba ucinga ngokuqala.
- Zinike ilungelo lokwenza iimpazamo kunye nokugxeka kwidilesi yakho, kuba ukugxeka kuthetha intsingiselo kumsebenzi wakho nenkolelo yokuba unokukwazi.
- Ngomncinci kangangoko unako ukuzithelekisa kwabanye kwaye ungazithethi ukuba ungaphumeleli, uthathe njengoluhlobo oluthile lwenxalenye yobomi.
- Kubalulekile ukuba ufunde ukuzidumisa, ukuba ungaboni nje kuphela iimpazamo, kodwa kunye neziqhamo kwaye uzikhumbuze rhoqo ngazo.
- Ekugqibeleni, zifumene umsebenzi ngomphefumlo, ngenxa yokuzonwabisa, kungabikho.
Ngokusoloko kubonakala ngathi abaphelelisileyo yimigangatho yempumelelo, banwabile ngakumbi kwaye banonwabe ngakumbi kunathi. Nangona kunjalo, aba bantu bahlala benganelisekanga ngokwabo, bahlala bexhalabile kwaye abazi kakuhle impilo yokomoya. Ukugqitywa ekugqibeleni ukugqibelela, kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuba ihlabathi aliyi kufikelela ekufezekeni, ngoko akufanele ufune kuye kwaye wena ngokwakho akunakwenzeka.