Ngaba zikhona iimvakalelo ezinyanisekileyo kwihlabathi lanamhlanje nendlela yokuziqonda? Umntu ngexesha lobomi ufumana amava amaninzi. Akunjalo ngamaxesha amahle kwaye ahlala ebuhlungu kwiintlobo zesini "izixhobo" kunye nokunyaniseka ukubonakalisa "ukufa okufana". Kodwa kukho abantu abaye banamava amaninzi, abazange baphelelwe amandla okubonisa ngokuqinisekileyo iimvakalelo zabo.
Kuthetha ukuthini ukunyaniseka?
Iimvakalelo ezithembekileyo zibonakalisa ngokwenene, ukubonakaliswa kwemvelo kwemvakalelo ezalwa ngumntu. Kwintliziyo yesigqibo sokunyaniseka lizwi elithi "spark". Ukuvakalelwa, kuvela njengentsimi, kwaye ngokukhawuleza kubonakaliswe kwihlabathi langaphandle, ngokuhambelana nokuziphatha, ukubonakalisa ubuso kunye nesimo sangaphakathi somntu ngexesha lokubonakalisa umvakalelo onyanisekileyo. Ukunyaniseka kuthetha:
- ukubonakalisa iimvakalelo kwi-"ecocekileyo", engavumelekanga ifom: uvuyo, intlungu, umsindo, umsindo, umona;
- ukuvuleka komntu;
- nya niseka;
- ukucaca kweengcamango;
- Isimo sengqibelelo kungekhona kwabanye abantu, kodwa nakwezinye.
Psychology of honestness
Inkqutyana yokunyaniseka kwengqondo ifundwa ngabafundi bezengqondo. Ukunyaniseka kubumba ebuntwaneni. Umntwana omncinci akayiqondi kakuhle into abazali bakhe abayifunayo okanye bayifunayo kuye, kodwa ngokucacileyo uhlukanisa isimo sengqondo somama noyise. Ukucaciswa ngokucacileyo kubonakalisa ngokubonakalisa ubuso, isenzo, isandi sezwi. Umama uphawula umntwana, uthetha ilizwi elikrakra, kodwa ubona ukuba ubuso bakhe abukrakali, ngoko ufunga "ngokungenangqiqo", ukuzonwabisa. Ukunyaniseka komntu kunokufunda ngokubonakaliswa okungabonakaliyo:
- Ukubonisa imimiselo yeemvakalelo kwicala lasekunene nekhohlo lobuso;
- ngexesha le ncoko, umboniso onomdla kumnxibelelwano;
- ukulungiswa ngokukhululekile.
Ukunyaniseka nokunyaniseka yinto ekhoyo
Iingcamango zokuthi "ukunyaniseka" kunye "nokunyaniseka" zidlalwa njengento efanayo, zifana, kodwa azifani. Uthini umahluko phakathi kokunyaniseka nokunyaniseka:
- Ukunyaniseka kuyimvakalelo ebonakalisa ngokubonakalisa ngokuthe ngqo, okungazi kakuhle iimvakalelo: ukuvakalelwa kwangaphakathi ngaphakathi kwaye kwangoko kubonakala kwihlabathi langaphandle.
- Ukunyaniseka yinto yokuziphatha kunye nenhlalakahle, ivela "kukuhlonipha", "ngokuhlonipha", "ukuhlonipha". Abantu abathembekileyo bahlonishwa kuluntu. Ukunyaniseka kuhlangene nezenzo zomntu.
- Ukunyaniseka kukuhambelana kwentetho kunye nokubonakaliswa kwangaphandle (congruence).
- Ukunyaniseka - kuquka ukunyaniseka nokunyaniseka okusekelwe kwimilinganiselo yokuziphatha.
Ukunyaniseka - ngaba kuyimfuneko ngoku?
Ukunyaniseka kuyimpawu yomntu kunye nabantu abakhulisa kwintsapho, apho kukho ukukhuthazwa kwemvakalelo, kunzima ukuzikhusela ngokwabo. Abantu abanjalo banzima ebantwini, kuba ukunyaniseka kubonisa ukuhanjiswa kweemvakalelo ezintle kunye nezibi. Ukunyaniseka kuthathwa njengomgangatho wobuntu obuvuthiweyo, ukulungele ukumelana nokuhlekwa usulu, ukunyaniseka nokuhlala uqobo. Iimvakalelo ezithembekileyo ziya kuhlala zifuna, ngenxa yokuba:
- Nabani na umntu, kwanomntu ongeyinyaniso, ufuna imimoya.
- Kwintsapho - ukunyaniseka kukubonakalisa ukuthembela kunye nobudlelwane obuvuthiweyo phakathi kwabatshatileyo;
- Ekuphuhlisweni komntwana, iimvakalelo ezivakalayo neemvakalelo ziyimfuneko ebalulekileyo ekukhuliseni ubuntu obumanyeneyo.
Indlela yokuvavanya umntu ngokunyaniseka kweemvakalelo?
Yiyiphi intombazana okanye umfazi ongeke aphuphe malunga neemvakalelo kunye nomlingane wakhe? Isilinganisi sokunyaniseka kwindoda ayisoloko iqondakala, kuba isondo esomeleleyo sisenza nayiphi na imvakalelo, kuba ngokwemvelo umntu "ufanele ukuba avinjelwe. Ukunyaniseka kwemvakalelo yeqabane kungabonwa ngolu hlobo lulandelayo:
- Amagama omntu akavumelani nemisebenzi kunye nezenzo zakhe;
- Uthanda ukunyamekela umfazi othandekayo;
- Ngomzuzu obunzima uvelise ngobubele kwaye uzama ukunciphisa ukungathandeki komlingane;
- Kubalulekile ukuba abe nexesha lokubambisana;
- unike izipho;
- Ulungele inceba yakhe;
- Umona ngaphakathi kwimida efanelekileyo unokuba ngumqondiso weemvakalelo ezinyanisekileyo.
Indlela yokuvavanya umfazi ngokunyaniseka kweemvakalelo?
Ukunyaniseka nokunyaniseka kukuqinisekisa ukuba ulwalamano oluthembekileyo nolunempumelelo phakathi kwendoda nomfazi . Kuyintoni ukunyaniseka kwintsebenziswano, kunzima kunesondo esomeleleyo ukuqonda intandazana ngokunyaniseka okanye ukuzenza iinjongo zayo. Amanye amadoda, ezama ukuyiqonda le nto, hamba ngokugqithisa kwaye uqale ulandele yonke inyathelo lentombazana yakhe. Imvakalelo enyanisekileyo evela kwisini esinobuthathaka ibonakaliswa ngale ndlela:
- ukufudumala apho intombazana inxibelelana nentanda yakhe;
- unika iimvakalelo zakhe ngaphandle kokufuna into ethile ngokubuyisela;
- Kubuhlungu umntu ukuba athambe kunye namanye amabhinqa;
- ubona kule ndoda impawu ezintle, kwaye uyamkela ukungalungi njengoko kunjalo;
- ichitha ixesha elininzi lokubonakala, ukuba lithandeke kuye;
- Unomdla kumdla wokwenene ebomini womthandayo;
- Ukwabelana nalo mlingane kunye novuyo.
Indlela yokubona ubungqina bomhlobo?
Ubungane kuqala kokunyaniseka, ngoko ke abafazi bakholelwa. Inqobo yohlobo lomfazi lukhulu kakhulu. Abantu basetyhini basengozini kwaye banengqondo kwaye kwiintlobo ezininzi bodwa banokubambisana: ngubani ohle kakhulu, uphumelele okanye uphumelele kumadoda. Ubuhlobo bokwenyaniso obuphakathi kwabasetyhini bubaluleke kakhulu kwaye kuyisipho esifanelekileyo. Ukubonakaliswa kokunyaniseka komhlobo:
- Ugcina zonke iimfihlelo kwaye uxubushe imfihlelo;
- 'unokulila ekoneni';
- ihlonipha iimfuno kunye nemilinganiselo yokuziphatha yomhlobo;
- Uvuyiswa ngokunyanisekileyo kwimpumelelo kwaye ibuhlungu xa kulandela ukusilela;
- Musa ukuzithoba ngeentombi zakhe;
- rhoqo ukuhlala kwindawo iya kubonisa uluvo olubalulekileyo, ukuba imiphumo emihle yimeko ixhomekeke kulo;
- uyaqonda ngaphandle kwamagama;
- uyakwazi ukuxolela.
Indlela yokuhlakulela ukunyaniseka?
Ungafunda njani ukunyaniseka kwaye uhlakulele le mfanelo ngokwakho? Iingcali zengqondo zithi njengaluphi na ubuchule, ukunyaniseka kunokuphuhliswa ngokwenza izinto ezenziwayo:
- Ukunxibelelana nabantu abanyanisekileyo . Ukuba ubeka ingqalelo, abantu abanjalo bajikelezwe ngamandla akhethekileyo kunye nesibindi, abanye bathandwa kubo. Umntu ongenamdla angakhange atyelele ingqalelo.
- Ukufunda unxibelelwano olufanelekileyo lwengqondo . Kuwuncedo ukuba amazinga anikwe umsebenzi wokupompa ubuchule bokuthembeka.
- Ukulahla izakhiwo ezinzima . Ngokuqhelekileyo ukunyaniseka, iintloni kunye neentloni kukuthintela ukuba unyanise nabanye, naluphi na inyathelo elungele ukunyaniseka lenza iingcamango ezibuhlungu ngokungafezeki kwakhe kunye nokwesaba "baya kucinga ntoni ngam?"
- Ukuvuleka . Ukuba ukusingqongileyo kukuthenjelwa, kutheni ungazami ukuzityhila ngokwakho, bonisa ubumnandi bakho, ukufudumala kunye nokuthatha inxaxheba kubantu abangaziwayo. Kule ndlela kuphela umntu unokufumana amava okuthetha ngokunyanisekileyo.
- Sebenza ngentetho . Iintetho ezinobungozi kwizwi zingabonakalisa ukungathembeki okanye ukungakhathaleli.