Ungayiqonda njani ukuba umntu uyakuthanda ngokwenene?

Wonke amabhinqa amaphupha okuba nendoda enothando ngokwenene. Yiyo le mvakalelo emangalisayo ekuvumela ukuba ube nolwalamano oluqinileyo lobomi. Nangona kunjalo, andifuni ukuchitha ixesha lam kwaye ndizinikele kumntu ongafanelanga. Ngoko ke, phantse yonke ilungu lezesondo elifanelekileyo linomdla kumbuzo wokuqonda ukuba umntu uyakuthanda ngokwenene.

Indlela yokuqonda ukuba indoda ikuthanda ngokwenene - kwengqondo

Ukuqhubela phambili kwiinkcazo zeengqondo zengqondo, kunokwenzeka ukuba nayiphi na ibhinqa ukuzimisela isimo sengqondo somntu omele ummeli wesini esahlukileyo, kuphela umntu ofuna ukucinga ngenyameko, ngaphandle kokuzama ukumbumba into ethile. Kufanelekile ukukhankanya, ukufumanisa ukuba imvakalelo enyanisekileyo yindoda, ayiyi kuba neveki enye okanye kwinyanga. Nangona into yokuba intombazana yonke iyavuya ukuva amagama amnandi kwidilesi yakhe kwaye imthanda ukuvuma, isiphetho esifanelekileyo singenziwa kuphela ngokuhlaziya ukuziphatha kunye nezenzo zomthandi. Ukucinga malunga nendlela yokuqonda ukuba umntu uyakuthanda ngokwenene, ungalokothi wenze izigqibo zakho, kuphela ngokusekelwe kumagama awayekuva kuye. Izizathu ezinokubangela umntu ukuba aqale ukuthetha amazwi abonisa ukuba uyamthanda ngokunyanisekileyo, kunokubaninzi. Nangona kunjalo, akunakwenzeka ukuba uya kubava emva kokufezekisa oko wayekufunayo.

Kukho nabameli abanjalo bendoda, abayinto enamahloni ngokwenyama kwaye abanakukwazi ukuthetha ngeemvakalelo zabo. Emva koko umfazi uya kufuneka acinge ngendlela yokuqonda ukuba umntu uyakuthanda, kodwa uyayika ukuyivuma. Xa uziqinisekisile ngale nto, kukufanele uthathe amanyathelo okudibana kunye nokubonisa intlungu kuye, ukuze azimisele ngakumbi.

Phendula kumbuzo wendlela yokuqonda ukunyaniseka kweenjongo zomntu kunye nenyaniso yokuba uyakuthanda, unakho ngeendlela ezininzi. Kuya kukwanela ukuqwalasela eziphambili:

1. Xa umntu efumana uthando lwakhe, kamva uya kutshintsha ngokupheleleyo, njengobomi bakhe bonke. Uya kuzama ukuba ngcono kuyo yonke into. Lahla loo miqobo engenzi lutho kuye.
2. Ungazami ukusikrazula kwiinkampani kwaye ungafuni ukudibana nabahlobo bakho. Ngokuqinisekileyo, yena ngokwakhe ukhetha ukuchitha ixesha elide kunye nentombi yentliziyo yakhe. Kwintlanganiso kunye nabahlobo, naye ufuna ukuthatha intanda yakhe.
3. Indoda enothando, nangona kunjalo ixakekile, iya kuhlala ifuna isizathu sokudibana kunye kunye neminithi yamahhala ukubiza kunye nokufumanisa indlela iindaba zakho zingakanani.
4. Uya kuhlala enyamekela, phulaphula oko kukukhathazayo kwaye uzama ukukunceda ukulungisa iingxaki zakho.
5. Ukuba umntu wakho ngokukhawuleza waqala ukukukhanyela ukuba uhambe nabahlobo kude kube semini, ungamgijimli ngenxa yaloo nto. Oku kunye nezinye izivumelwane ezifanayo akubonakali ukuzingca. Uxhalabile kwaye ukhathazeke kakhulu ukuba akukho nto embi eya kwenzeka kuwe. Ngako oko, isimo sengqondo sifanele sijongwe njengobonakaliso beemvakalelo ezinyanisekileyo.

Uyakuqonda njani ukuba umyeni wam uyakuthanda?

Nangona behlala ndawonye iminyaka emininzi, abafazi abaninzi bahlupheka ukungathandabuzeki ngokunyaniseka kwemvakalelo yomlingane wakho. Nangona kunjalo, ukuqonda isimo sakhe sengqondo akunzima. Umyeni onothando uya kuzama ukwenza konke intsapho yakhe, uncedise ngemisebenzi yasekhaya, uhlale nabantwana, njl. Uyakhathalela kwaye uzama ukuphucula imeko yakhe yezemali ukuze aphile ndawonye ngokuthuthuzela. Ngenxa yoko, unokuhlala ehlala emsebenzini, kwaye umfazi wakhe unengcamango embi. Nangona kunjalo, kule meko ingxaki ayikho kumyeni, kodwa ekungathembeki komfazi. Indoda ethanda ngokwenene, iziphatha ngokusobala, ayizami ukufihla into ethile kwisiqingatha sayo sesibini. Ukongezelela, indoda enothando ayiyi kuvumela abazali bakhe okanye ezinye izalamane ukuba zicaphukise umfazi kwaye ziphazamise ubudlelwane.