Ukubona isihloko sesicatshulwa esicetywayo, ndangena kwi-kaleidoscope yexesha elidlulileyo. Abahlobo abasondeleyo, abahlobo nje okanye abasebenzisana nabo ... Yeyiphi into engaqhelekanga eyenzekayo!
Ngokuqinisekileyo ngamnye kubo ngexesha elithile ebomini babo bephakamisa umbuzo wendlela yokukhokela indoda esatshatileyo. Enyanisweni, kwakukho olunye udidi lwabafazi-abafazi, abaye bazama ukukhokela la madoda. Ngoku, emininzi kwiminyaka kamva, ndandifuna nje ukubenza babhekane ubuso nabo-abo babezama ngamandla ukwenza isigqibo sokuba bathathe njani umthandi ngaphandle kwentsapho, kunye nalabo abathandwa ngumyeni wabo. Ngoko ke, ukuba ucinga ukuba eli nqaku liyakunceda uqonde indlela yokuthabatha indoda ngaphandle kwentsapho, musa ukuchitha ixesha lokufunda.
Kwathi kwenzeka ukuba ndidibana naba bafazi abaselula ngexesha elifanayo. Ngamnye wabo ngelo xesha wayenxulumene nomntu otshatileyo. Ukwahlukana kuphela kukuba ababini babecinga ngokungaqhelekanga icebo lokuba bangamthabatha njani lo mfazi kumfazi wakhe, kwaye okwesithathu wazithoba kwaye wasula ulwalamano olukhoyo. Umbuzo wendlela yokumthabatha kwintsapho ngaphambi kokuba avuke. Wachaza ngokucacileyo: "Akayi kushiya."
Ubuhlobo bethu buhlala iminyaka emithathu. Yonke iminyaka emithathu kwi-ajenda enobumba obunobumba obunokubhaliswa kwimixholo efanayo - indlela yokuthabatha othandekayo ngaphandle kwentsapho. Omnye wabahlobo bam ngelo xesha wanquma ukuzala waza wazala umthandana lakhe, ukuba enye ineminyaka yonke, wayigubha ngexesha lokuhlwa ukuya kwesinye siphelo saloo dolophu-ezama ukuba ngandlela-thile afumanise ukuba ubuthongole ngempela kwigumbi elihlukileyo nomfazi wakhe.
Ndiya khumbula iifowuni zabo nangaliphi ixesha lomhla kunye neengxabano ezinomkhuhlane malunga nokuba ungamthabatha njani kwintsapho. Yaba yintoni umphumo? Akukho. Impendulo yombuzo wokuthatyathwa kwintsapho yendoda esatshatileyo ayifumanekanga, kwaye le ndoda esatshatileyo yayibonakala ihamba kunye nabahlobo bam kuphela kanye ngeveki-ngaphandle koku, ngokwemvelo, iiholide.
Kuthiwani ngabafazi, ngubani owaziwayo, phantse njalo ama-mummers awela phantsi komgaqo olula: "Musa ukubeka i-closet!"? Ndiyakhumbula umlingane wam, indoda yakhe, ebiza izinto ngamagama abo afanelekileyo, edibaniswe kumnyama. Xa omnye umphefumlo onyanzelekile wazama "ukuvula amehlo," waphulaphula ngokukhawulezileyo, wathi: "Ngobusuku ulala embhedeni wam. Kwasekuseni uvuka ebhedeni lam. Andinomdla kunoma yini enye. " (Mthandi othandekayo, ukuba ngubani na onokufumana indlela yokukhokelela indoda kumfazi wakhe obandazelayo ngegazi ngokuchaza into efana nale - nceda ungayigcinanga imfihlo!)
Ngomnye umhlobo wam, umfazi ozolile kwaye olungele kakuhle, sadibana nesibhedlele, apho iiveki ezimbini zachithwa kwiwadi enye. Thetha malunga nendlela yokuthabatha umntu otshatileyo, waqala kunye nam - njengokuba ndaqonda, nje ndizama ukutshixa ubuncinane umntu oqokelelweyo. Kwaye emva kweminyaka emininzi ibinzana eliqhelekileyo lomyeni wakhe, "ndaya esitolo," kwakuthetha ukuba akayi kuvela kungekudala kweyure kamva - mhlawumbi ngeendlela zokubeka umlomo kwikhola yakhe, okanye ukuthunga umhlobo othile.
Yiloo nto athi kuye: "Akayi kuze afake umtshato. Kuya kubakho ukwahlula indlu, i-dacha, inokubhabhisa isitulo sakhe kwiSebe. Ndiya kufakazela umtshato - kwiminyaka embalwa, xa intombi yam isakhulile. Ndisoloko ndicinga ukuba zininzi zizilumko zilwa malunga nendlela yokuthatha indoda ngaphandle kwentsapho. Nam, ngokuqinisekileyo, ngamnye umfazi wakhe uthembisa ukuba uya kundiphosa. "
Ewe, kuthekani ngomxholo wengxabano, ozama ukukhokelela, ukugxotha, ukudiliza, ukucima?
Kwaye kwenzeka ukuba iminyaka emininzi ndasebenza phakathi kwamadoda. Omnye wam osebenza nabo babekwe kwinqanaba elifanayo lezesondo eziqinileyo, ezihlala zijongene nabasetyhini kumbuzo othi: "O, kakuhle, ukuba ungathatha njani umntu onjalo?!" Phantse bonke bawashintsha abafazi babo - umntu omkhulu, umntu ophantsi , kwaye ngokuqhelekileyo ngendlela enobungane ndidibana nam, ndifuna ukufumana "imbono yowesifazane ngale ngxaki."
Ndikhumbula amazwi omnye wabo: "Ewe, ndiyazi ukuba ndiyindoda. Andikwazi ukuphosa enye ingubo. Emva koko ndidakile, kuba ndinentloni phambi kuka-Olga. Kuhle ukuba uhlala undixolela. Ndiyamthanda kakhulu kwaye andiyikuyeka - nangona ndixelela wonke umfazi endiyaphuphayo ukutshata naye. "
... Kubonakala ngathi abafazi bazama ukuthatha isigqibo sokuba bangamthabatha njani loo mntu, bebuya ngaloo mihla xa beqhayisa ngaphandle kwe "suit from ..." kodwa "ukuphuma ngaphandle ..." Ingaba ibali lisitsho ngani ngabo phu melela? Inyaniso yokuba aba bafazi bekhokelwa nguMphefumlo, kungekhona ngoMva. Babengenalo nonke inomdla kwindlela yokuthabatha othandekayo wabo kwintsapho, ngenxa yesizathu esilula sokuba abazange bathande nabani na. Injongo yabo yaboniswa ngamagama athi "Ndingamthabatha njani le ndoda" - kungakhathaliseki ukuba bahamba nomfazi okanye inkosikazi. Uya kuthi - kodwa kuthekani ngemvakalelo? Ndifuna ukubuza umbuzo wempendulo - ngaba kukho na iimvakalelo, kwaye ukuba kunjalo, ziphi na?
"Akamthandi, uya kumshiya kungekudala, uthi uya kumshiya, uthi uhlala naye kuphela ngenxa yabantwana ..." Yeka indlela ezibuhlungu ngayo la mazwi kuwo onke amazwe, kuzo zonke iilwimi zehlabathi! Ndibaphulaphule ngoku nawaphi na amabhinqa, ndivakalelwa kukuba, phambi kokuba ndime ubuso bam nabangane bam baseMoscow - abalungileyo, abatsha, abanengqiqo, abanengqiqo.
Ubungakanani obungasidingi, amandla, isithunzi esetyenzisiweyo xa uzama ukunquma indlela yokuthabatha indoda yomntu ngaphandle kwentsapho - apho le ndoda yayingeke ihambe khona, kunye nendlela yokumthabatha loo ndoda kumfazi wayo - okungekho loo mntu ayayikuyeka. Uthando oluyimfama? Ubuninzi-okuyimpumputhe, ukuphishekela ngokuphangaleleyo injongo, engabonakaliyo ngokuthe gqolo yaba yintsikelelo engenanto engena ndawo.
... Ngandlela-thile, kakhulu, ixesha elide kakhulu elidlulileyo, ndakhangela kumhlobo wam - owaziwayo kwisigulana-ngqondo. Ndiyithandile imihlangano yethu kunye neengxoxo malunga nento (ngelo xesha kwakunzima kum ukuba ndicinga ukuba kaninzi kangakanani ndiyakhumbula ezinye zazo!) Ngelo xesha sathetha naye ngale ndlela - indlela yokuthatha indoda ngaphandle kwentsapho? Ndiyakhumbula ndibuza ukuba ndingathabatha njani indoda esatshatileyo kwintsapho, ukuba konke kulungile apho, ukuba kukho umfazi omthandayo kunye nabantwana abamthandayo.
Yiloo nto athi kum: "Unokuthatha nayiphi na indoda, ngaphandle kokunye. Kodwa uyabona, yintoni umcimbi. Umfazi uyisfafa, inkosikazi yintonga yeenqwelo. Kutheni kufuneka alahlekelwe ngumbhede, ukuba unako ukuba nobini? "
Ngoko uthatha njani indoda kwintsapho? Ukususela ekuqaleni, ndayilumkisa ukuba andinakuphendula impendulo yalo mbuzo. Enyanisweni, ngokuqinisekileyo, ndingathi yena ngokwakhe, ngaphandle kokungathandabuzeki, angathanda i-sofa, kungekhona isitulo sezandla-nangona kunjalo ukhululekile kwaye umhle le sihlalo.